HEY! Assbutt!

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277k ratings

See, that’s what the app is perfect for.

Sounds perfect Wahhhh, I don’t wanna
sparkafterdark-deactivated20181
sparkafterdark:
“tyrannosarcophagous:
“ nerdgul:
“ sparkafterdark:
“ witchchad:
“ totallyfubar:
“ sparkafterdark:
“ momunofu:
“ dadurl:
“ momunofu:
“ chillin on a Saturday night
”
Calm down jojo
”
you’re right, I am looking a little stiff here, I...
momunofu

chillin on a Saturday night

dadurl

Calm down jojo

momunofu

you’re right, I am looking a little stiff here, I should try to relax

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sparkafterdark

You call that “chillin”?

Everyone knows the best way to relax is with a good book and a warm drink

totallyfubar

I dunno, man,

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 sometimes I like just relaxing on my laptop

witchchad

image

get on my level boys

sparkafterdark

Unfortunately to “get on your level” I’d need a boat trip to the Mariana Trench and a pair of cinderblock shoes.

nerdgul

Thats gotta be the sickest burn ive ever read holy fuck

tyrannosarcophagous

this post appears once every million years

sparkafterdark

I kept hoping someone else would one up me and I’d have to escalate even further but nobody has.

My mom has ADD and she gets distracted super easily. I hated middle school with a passion and my school had a front entrance and a back entrance. So sometimes I would wait until my brother was getting out of the car and tell my mom I wanted to be dropped off at the other entrance. Before we got out of the parking lot to whatever entrance we dropped my brother off at I would start talking to her about an interesting topic and get her distracted enough that she would just start driving home. Usually we would get halfway home and she would realize she didn’t drop me off. Then she would say “fuck it… we’re playing hooky” and she would just take me home.